Ask Kelli: Working Out, Siblings that Complain, & Material Girl Wanting to Change

Dear Kelli,
I'm pretty busy and don't have much time to work out. With two kids (7 and 9), a dog, and a husband who is almost like a third kid, I barely have time to go to the bathroom. Thoughts?

Signed,
Resolution to Work Out


Dear Resolution to Work Out,
Well, it's certainly understandable that it's hard for you to find the time to work out. But we're not letting you off the hook so easily. Here are my suggestions:

1) Buy some home exercise DVDs and look for ones that offer 10 minute workouts. Even 10 minutes is better than nothing and you can always do 10 minutes in the morning and 10 minutes in the evening. You can preview some here:
http://www.collagevideo.com/exercise-videos/10-minute-solution-exercise-videos-2\
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2) Exercise at the park with the kids. You can do pull-ups on the monkey bars, race the kids to the fountain, do jumping jacks, etc. In other words, make exercise at the park a game. The kids will have fun and you'll be burning calories!

3) Take a family adventure. Winter sports are great for calorie burning. Go snow shoeing, skiing, ice skating, rock climbing indoors, etc.

4) Invest in the Wii. The Wii is a video game system that works directly with your movements. So essentially you're burning calories while playing games. What's great about this is that you can play with your kids (and your kids can also get some exercise) or you can buy the Wii Fit (a separate game) and get a great workout by yourself.

5) Park far away. (Hey, every step counts.)

All the best,
Kelli


Dear Kelli,
My sister Darlene has always been a bit of a pessimist. We live far away but frequently talk by phone. Lately all the complaining has really gotten to me. I feel like I never get a chance to tell her what is going on in my life because she's so focused on hers. How can I get a word in? I've tried to have a honest conversation with her but it didn't go over too well.

Signed,
Mute Sister



Dear Mute Sister,
Here's what I would do next time she calls: "Darlene! It's great to talk to you. Listen, I got about 20 minutes before I have to run out the door. So what if I tell you what is going on with me for 10 minutes, then you do the same? Do you mind if I start, though? I've been dying to tell you about…[insert interesting comment here]"

All the best,
Kelli


Dear Kelli,
I'm embarrassed that I'm really materialistic. What can I do to change it?

Signed,
Gold Digger


Dear Gold Digger,
Good for you for seeing a character defect and wanted to modify it. I would first identify why you feel you are materialistic. Is it because you want to impress people? Or do you feel powerful with expensive items? Try to answer that question honestly. It will make a big difference. Given your answer, try to replace what you want with more emotional responses. For example, if your answer was because you want to impress people (meaning you want to feel special) maybe write a list about what you feel makes you different or unique (or if that is too hard, you can ask a friend or family member the same question). Next, take contrary action. In other words, try and make others feel special and powerful (i.e. complimenting them, volunteering, etc.). You'll be amazed how helping someone else will in the end make you feel better. Finally, commit to one big goal and making small steps to achieve that goal. So for example if your big goal was to stop buying expensive labels and you are buying three chic label items per week, try and cut that down to two during week one, and then one item during week two. Keep doing this until you are finally buying just one chic label once in a while.

All the best,
Kelli