Ask Kelli: Sister Not Attending Events, Making Fun of People, & Asking Out a Girl...Again

Dear Kelli,
My sister has never attended any of my kids’ events (soccer games, birthday parties, etc.) nor has she ever given them any gifts. I just got an invite to her child’s Bar Mitzvah. Does my family go even though she never attended any of our events? Do we get a gift despite the fact she never gave our family any?
Signed,
Spiteful

Dear Spiteful,
I learned something awhile back. Never let anyone else’s behavior determine your character. Yes, it was wrong and hurtful for your sister never to attend any of your family’s events. So why would you do the same? Plus you don’t want to punish your sister’s kid for something your sister did. Remember this event is in honor of her son, not her! I would go and be the bigger person. As far the gift goes, you don’t have to go crazy but I would do a little something. Again, don’t let your sister’s behavior influence yours.
Perhaps this could open up a whole new line of communication between the families?
All the best,
Kelli

Dear Kelli,
I was with a group of work colleagues the other day and one guy “Dan” started making fun of a new girl in our office “Stephanie,” who’s extremely overweight. We were in front of everyone so I just laughed along with the crowd. I think I would have felt awkward if I said something. What do you think?
Signed,
Feeling Bad

Dear Feeling Bad,
Those situations aren’t easy to be in but in order for it to stop someone has to say something. That someone can be you next time. It doesn’t have to be a big deal. Just something along the lines of, “Dan, that isn’t really nice. Stephanie is a really sweet girl.” Ironically, you won’t be the one everyone feels awkward about- it will be the guy who made the rude comment. And I almost guarantee “Dan” won’t be making fun of anyone in the near future again. It’s amazing how once someone is embarrassed they learn their lesson quickly.
All the best,
Kelli

Dear Kelli,
I’ve asked out a girl twice already and got turned down both times. But the funny thing is the girl still flirts with me when I see her out. Do I try one more time?
Signed,
Third Time’s a Charm

Dear Third Time’s a Charm,
Yes, I’d give it one last shot but that’s it.

You can even preface it with a little humor like this, “Hey Cindy, I know I’ve asked you out and you keep turning me down. But I feel a connection between us so I’m giving it one last shot. And I promise this is it. So if you say no now you’re losing me forever.”

Then make it the last time no matter if she flirts with you until the cows come home.
All the best,
Kelli